Learn Why Being Honest With God Is The Best Way

Learn why being honest with God is the best way to be with Him, and the good that comes from it. Discover how to go deeper in your honesty with God. Guest writer: Debby Osa.


Years ago, I found myself in a limbo in my relationship with God. I was going through all the motions — praying, reading my Bible, attending church, etc. There were also no obvious sins in my life — but I knew something wasn’t right, and I couldn’t put a finger on it. 

There seemed to be a wall between God and me.

One day, I went to the church I used to attend. It wasn’t a service day, so it was deserted. (An empty, silent church building is an amazing place to be alone. Try it out if you can find one.)

I took a comfortable spot and began to worship and talk to the Lord as usual. “Father, I bless You. I worship You because You are worthy, and I praise you for…”

Out of nowhere, I heard the Lord say, “Talk to me.”

So, I began again, “Father, I praise you. I thank you because…”

He cut in again, and repeated, “Deborah, talk to me…”

I paused for a bit, wondering, then I began afresh, “Father, I bless you because you are…”

For the third time, the Lord interrupted me gently, “Deborah, talk to me…”

…and I just burst out in tears, “Father, I don’t trust you!”

I was shocked — no, stunned — at my own outburst.

If you had told me two seconds earlier that that was in my heart, I would have violently rejected it. But it was — because out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks. (Matthew 12:34)

God’s Response to My Honesty with Him

And how do you think God reacted? 

Stupefied at my blowup? Furious at my lack of ‘dishonour’? Insulted that I didn’t trust His Holy Sovereignty?

Nope. 

Instead, He let me pour out my heart and ask questions: about why he allowed some things to happen; about why He didn’t allow certain others to happen; about my fears and insecurities regarding His desires — about a lot of things.

And He listened — and understood.

You see, the Lord already knew what was in my heart — and he wanted me to be honest enough to admit it and bring it to Him.

That was a defining turning point in our walk — and my relationship with him just sky-rocketed from five to a hundred-and-fifty.

Learn how being honest with God can be a defining turning point in your relationship with Him. @debbynkemeti #LiveYielded Click To Tweet

I Told God the Blunt Truth: “I Want to Sin”

Years ago, I went out of state for about a year, and I got close to a wrong person. Even though nothing immoral had occurred, I knew it was just a matter of time because: 

  1. the physical chemistry was insane
  2. the individual had no reservations about immorality — and had made it very clear (purity is easy when both parties want to please God)
  3. we were living in the same building

It was a recipe for disaster.

I was much younger — age-wise and spiritually — and I didn’t know how to handle the situation like I do now, so I struggled with my thoughts and the pull. I tried to put a distance between us, but it was a downward slope. The proximity wasn’t helping matters.

Finally, one night, I sat with God in a dark, empty room and told Him the blunt truth. “Father, I am going to sin — and, what’s more, I want to sin.”

Then I proceeded to tell Him in graphic, explicit details what I wanted to do. You see, I had come so far along in my honesty-walk with God, I had no reservations anymore. I knew He already knew my thoughts, so I couldn’t pretend — or shock Him.

Then, I told him, “I also know that if I sin, and come back to you, you will forgive me. I really want to sin — but make me not want to.” Crazy prayer, huh?

The next day — in a strange and very dramatic way — that feeling leaked out of me like air from a deflated balloon. Suddenly, unlike previously when I was struggling ‘not to’, I had absolutely no atom of desire to sin. 

What’s more, the other party had to go out of state for a long, long time….

…and all because I had been honest with God.

Go Deeper in Your Honesty-Walk with God

You see, the most beautiful relationships are those where the parties involved are open and vulnerable with each other. The more ‘real’ you are to each other, the closer you get — and the more you like/love each other. 

Why would we expect less in our relationship with God?

It’s therefore not surprising that many of us are struggling in our relationship with Him. Oh, we are not blatantly dishonest or hypocritical, but we have become religious, just like I was in my first example — going through the motions without a real relationship.

So we say what we think we should say, and act how we think we should — and all the while, our lives are full of unresolved issues and our hearts are out of sync with the Father’s:

  • We don’t question Him about things that desperately bother us because, “God is sovereign. He knows what’s best.”
  • We don’t tell Him about our internal struggles because, “I shouldn’t be feeling these feelings.”
  • We suppress our resentments towards others — and even Him — because “I shouldn’t be thinking these thoughts.”

We go through the motions, and wonder why God seems far away and we feel closer to other humans — then we rationalise it away with, “Anyway, I can’t physically see Him.”

Being Honest with God Brings Spiritual Growth

You see, I have learnt that true Christian growth is not just a walk of faith — but also one of honesty. Afterall, we began our Christian walk by admitting we were not good enough to save ourselves – and that we needed help.

The Bible says God is light — and in Him is no darkness at all. 

Darkness involves deceit, ambiguity, deception, hypocrisy, untruths or half-truths.

With God, there is no whitewashing or pretense — and if you are not totally, fully, completely, heart-wrenchingly honest with Him, you will find your relationship severely limited.

  • He desires you tell Him how you feel like abandoning your family because of the overwhelming financial and emotional pressures.
  • Yes, it’s uncomfortable — but He prefers that you acknowledge that your new coworker is getting more attractive to you than your husband with every passing day.
  • He wants you to be honest with Him about how you envy your friend/sister/cousin because she seems to have it all — and you can barely get your life together.
  • He wants you to tell Him — even as your face burns in humiliation — about your secret (or not-so-secret) addiction and how, truly, you don’t really want His help to stop because they give you so much pleasure.
When you’re honest with God, you weaken the power of ‘darkness’ over that situation because you have brought it to the ‘Light’ @debbynkemeti #LiveYielded Click To Tweet

You know what happens when you honestly tell the Father about anything?

You weaken the power of ‘darkness’ over that situation because you have brought it to the ‘Light’, and invited Jesus in — and when you invite Him into anything, it can never remain the same.

So, on a scale of 1 to 10, how honest are you with God?

Meet the Writer

Debby Osa is a Christian blogger, writer and speaker — as well as author of the books, ‘Inanna’ and ‘According To Pattern’. She loves all-things-God, amazing teaching of the Word, creative works that keep you spellbound — and finger foods. She is currently based in Lagos, Nigeria and blogs at debbyosa.com.

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22 Comments

  1. Cynthia Jordan says:

    I absolutely love this story! I feel it will help my growth in Christ by leaps and bounds! All because I was given a new way to look at myself and God!

      1. Mary mazyopa says:

        Am so blessed because what you have said it is true that we’re not being honest with God, I will talk to him and tell him what exactly is going on in my mind
        More grace

  2. Motunrayo says:

    Thank you Debby…
    This is an eye opener, I struggled within not knowing I could say it all, however I can express myself to HIM. I will try it out. I will be very honest. Thank you so much, I’m indeed blessed! Shalom!

  3. Your honesty is refreshing, Debby. I appreciate your vulnerability and authenticity. Yes, I walk with God in pure undiluted honesty of the things deep down in my heart – my joys and sorrows, my triumphs and concerns, and everything in between. It really is the only way to live with Him.

    1. I’m glad to hear that you are yielding yourself to God in all areas, Lisa!

  4. Debbie this is beautiful! Thank you for sharing your vulnerability and love for God! I love “You weaken the power of ‘darkness’ over that situation because you have brought it to the ‘Light’, and invited Jesus in — and when you invite Him into anything, it can never remain the same.” I believe the same way and love that He loves us no matter what.

  5. Debby, I have SO been there myself! God truly does want us to come to Him and be honest with Him about everything! I don’t always think about it but He already knows everything about me, even the thoughts I’m going to be thinking later today! Thank you for this very beautiful and transparent blog post sweet sister! Blessings to you … 🙏❤️

  6. Thank you so much Debby, as always this is very deep.

  7. I’m here for one of my favourite bloggers Debbie. Thank you for always writing so beautifully well

  8. ARINAITWE Joseph says:

    Jesus Christ!
    What a special blessing to learn to be truly honest with God.
    I have always been blindfolded by the belief that in His Sovereignty He already knows it all.
    Honesty, I could score not more than 2/10 in being honest with God.
    I will start pouring to God all my anxieties going forward.
    Thank you Kelly,
    Thank you Debby.
    God bless you amazingly.

    1. So blessed to hear that the truth in this post impacted you and is bringing you closer to Jesus!

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