Day 39: How to Deal with Hurt by Rejection

Have you been hurt by rejection? Here’s how to overcome a victim mentaility as a child of God and find healing with a biblical response. From the 40 Days of Daily Bread Series.

Have you ever been hurt? Felt rejected?

Oh, I have! More times than I can count. One time someone that didn’t like me sabotaged my part in a special ceremony. An honor that was rightfully mine was going to be announced as I arrived. The person maliciously changed the announcers list just minutes before the special moment, so the unsuspecting announcer gave the honor to someone else. I was hurt by this rejection…deeply.

Afterwards, I was in my bedroom weeping, telling God how hurt I was. Through muffled sobs I heard a knock at my door. My parents came in and my mom said that she felt the Lord repeatedly saying, “Go hug Kelly,” but they didn’t know why yet. God hears the cry of a broken heart and that day I learned about how to deal with the pain of someone hurting you.

Victim Mentality

It is not a sin to feel hurt, but I thought it was okay (my right) to remain mad at that person because I was the victim in the situation. When we are a victim of being entangled in the pain of a hurting heart, we have a tendency to cling to our “rights.” Yet a child of God does not have rights because he has surrendered his life to the Father.

The Response

We all experience both real and perceived rejection, both of which need to be dealt with the same way. I learned that I had a choice to make: react with the habit patterns of the “old nature” and walk in the sin areas of resentment, anger, or self-pity?…Or choose to act with forgiveness, love, etc.? The “new nature” reveals itself through thoughts, speech and behavior of walking in the Spirit.

Healing from Hurt by Rejection

You have probably heard many times before to forgive, but don’t tune me out! It is the first step in your healing process. I wrote how each time I forgave the same person for the same offense I received healing in place of the bitterness that was trying to take root.

The Ride of Hurt by Rejection

When you get hurt, it’s like being taken for an uncontrollable ride. When we don’t humble ourselves and respond properly to feelings of hurt and rejection then speculative doubt turns into illusions of doubt, and finally actions of separation. We divorce our spouse, change our friends, or leave the church because rejection rejects. I’ll talk about this more another day.

Apply the Word

This section is to help us respond to the prompting of the Holy Spirit.

“But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves.” James 1:22 ESV

Check out the following posts to learn more about how to be healed from hurt by rejection.

• How to Be Healed from Hurt: a Triple-Braided Rope
• How God Heals the Heart-Shattering Pain of Hurt
• Forgive, but Not Forget? Not Exactly
• The Church Can Heal Through Three Doors of Prayer

How have you experienced hurt by rejection?

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